Sunday, April 06, 2008
Another year has passed..
A whole new life waiting to be lived.. If I can only know how to live it..
Today I am 33 years old, and I am also a divorced woman.. I don't know how we reached that point exactly, but I know that for this situation it was the best thing to do.. But that doesn't mean it's easy or nice.. After 7 years of marriage to the same guy I find myself somehow lost without the idea of him in my life.
It was no one fault and we are still good friends for the sake of our little girl, and because we've always been good friends right from the start.. But I think sometimes it just can't be enough in a marriage.. I know many of you reading this would think I lost my mind, and trust me I was so close to doing that while thinking about things b4 the divorce, but for those of you who know me well, I had to do this.. For the sake of my sanity, and every one else's.
At 33 I find it hard to think of other things to do beside being a wife , that was my dream for always, I know it's not much of a dream but I think that I never gave myself the chance to think of anything beside love, romance and marriage..
And now I have some growing up to do.. wish me luck it's not easy.. But I'm sure it's not going to be that hard either, after all I am blessed with so many good people in my life to give me support and love and encouragement..
I'll keep dreaming, because that's who I am, a dreamer.. But I will try to make my dreams more realistic if that's a possible thing to do.. I will try to live in my life more and be a bigger part in it. B4 it's too late to do that..
And sorry if I sound depressed, I am a bit, but I think it's just normal.. I've just been born into a new life in which I know nothing and need everything.
But tomorrow is another day, and I think inshallah that everything will work out for the best.. I'll just never give up on me. I love me.. I want me to be happy and I will do that inshallah...
So Happy birthday to me
( thanks N for the great greeting in your post, it made me smile a big one )